by Shirley M Mueller, MD

In a nutshell:

Though many collectors try to de-access their collections before death, this often does not happen.
If sold at an estate sale handled by loved ones, there is hope for memories of the deceased to be passed on: the “sticky” concept.
If professionals manage the estate sale, the chance of a “sticky” result is greatly diminished; instead, a “Teflon” effect is likely.

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While most collectors believe they will be able to sell their collections for more money than when they first purchased them, that does not seem to happen at all. Some, perhaps the lucky ones, do sell their items for a profit before they pass away. Others are not able to, even if they try. Then, some sell at a loss but have the comfort that others will not have to de-access for them. Lastly, some do not address the issue of de-accession at all. Then, unless a museum takes the collection (which is highly unlikely if the collector can’t sell it or the items are irrelevant), the only option is to give it to relatives. They may not want it either. Then, the last recourse is an estate sale after death, followed by donating leftovers to a charity thrift store or, worse yet, the landfill.

Entire wardrobes are often sold at Estate Sales — Entire wardrobes are often sold at estate s
ales

No collector wants to see this happen. The objects in the collection were carefully selected, to say nothing of the time and money invested. This is entirely different from an estate sale, where a buyer plans to pay next to nothing, regardless of the item’s worth.

Little is known about this type of situation when relatives sell their deceased family member’s possessions, prized or otherwise. In fact, though it happens all the time, source material related to it is scarce. In one publication, a 2019 article entitled “The Death of American Homes: A consideration of everyday objects, ritual, and emotions at the estate sale,” was particularly helpful, as were the few others listed below. In “The Death of American Homes,” the author, David Stiles Sparks, reserves a large section for what he calls “The Burden of Things?” This is, I feel, an unexplored area of collecting – when objects precious to a collector become something less to the family who is left with them. To them, they are an unwelcome responsibility, a problem, and a worry.

The Two Types of Estate Sales
Then, the relatives resort to an estate sale, of which there are two types. In one, the family is intimately involved in all aspects of the sale. This includes sorting the objects to be sold, promoting the sale, physically selling during the sale, and, finally, tabulating the dollars gleaned.

In the other type, a professional is hired to execute these tasks. The family is involved primarily only when the objects are transferred to the professional, and at the end, when they receive a check.

Family Management of the Estate Sale: The “Sticky” Concept

To my knowledge, little has been explored in relation to the family management of an estate sale per se. We do know, however, what Gretchen Herrmann revealed when writing extensively on garage sales, which are similar to estate sales. Sparks interprets her work when he says, “affective sharing takes place between sellers, the story holder of those items, and buyers.” One definition of emotional sharing (Decety, 2008) is emotional contagion. Thus, the emotion related to the item becomes contagious or “sticky.” The objects themselves contain a sort of transference of feeling between parties when the stories behind them are known. In this way, the previous owner is remembered as long as the buyer recollects the relevant memory. It is as though the purchased piece is in a museum, though that museum is within the memory of a single person rather than on display in an institution where all can see.

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Professional Management of the Estate Sale: The “Teflon” Concept
Here, all bets for “sticky” are off. The pieces sold have only economic value to the seller and the buyer. Much of the time, that value is less than it would be if a family member were there to chat and transfer information about the items.

Herrmann relates that stories are necessary for the healing of the family. None of this will occur at a professional estate sale. Furthermore, since the objects are extensions of the deceased, that person is entirely lost in this process. To describe this, I am using the term “Teflon,” the opposite of “sticky,” which Herrmann used. The reason is obvious: Teflon is a coating on a pan that makes it nonstick.

Beyond the Estate Sale
Items that are not sold at an estate sale are taken by the family, given to charity, discarded, or all three. Sadly, this is the end of a collecting life and something many collectors will face someday. Hopefully, those of us who are more fortunate will be able to dispose of what we consider valuable in ways that are suitable to us. If not, someone else must do it for us.

Items on display at an Estate Sale — Items on display at an estate sale

References
Sparks, David Stiles, (2019) “The Burden of Things?” 83-99 in “The Death of American Homes: A consideration of everyday objects, ritual, and emotions at the estate sale,” Senior Capstone Projects. 1-111. https://digitalwindow.vassar.edu/senior_capstone/834

Herrmann, Gretchen M. (2011). New Lives from Used Goods: Garage Sales as Rites of Passage. Ethnology 50(3): 1-36.

Herrmann, Gretchen M. (2014). Valuing Affect: The Centrality of Emotion, Memory, and Identity in Garage Sale Exchange. Anthropology of Consciousness 26(2): 170-182.

Decety J., & Meyer, M. (2008). From emotion resonance to empathic understanding: A social developmental neuroscience account. Development and Psychopathology 20, 1053–1080. doi:10.1017/S0954579408000503

Darach Turley & Stephanie O’Donohoe (2012) The sadness of lives and the comfort of things: Goods as evocative objects in bereavement, Journal of Marketing Management, 28:11-12, 1331-1353, DOI: 10.1080/0267257X.2012.691528

Shirley M. Mueller, M.D., is known for her expertise in Chinese export porcelain and neuroscience. Her unique knowledge in these two areas motivated her to explore the neuropsychological aspects of collecting, both to help herself and others as well. This guided her to write her landmark book, Inside the Head of a Collector: Neuropsychological Forces at Play. In it, she uses the new field of neuropsychology to explain the often-enigmatic behavior of collectors. Shirley is also a well-known speaker. She has shared her insights in London, Paris, Shanghai, and other major cities worldwide as well as across the United States. In these lectures, she blends art and science to unravel the mysteries of the collector’s mind.