Bob Cahn Guess What Article for October 2001
By Bob Cahn, “The Primitive Man”

Blunt and stunted like an artillery shell

A potential dispenser for Liquid Prell

Made of iron and brass with a hole that could drip
Sporting an acorn finial at the opposite tip-
Spring action controls an up and down motion,
That could possibly help one dispense their hand lotion.
As it hung on the wall, guess which end it up-
Was it used at Starbucks for cream in your cup?
Patented in 1864, did it hold ketchup or mustard,
Or could it dribble hot fudge on a cool frozen custard?

Some additional possibilities:

Shotgun buckshot loader
Powdered pumice hand cleaner holder
Egg nog nutmeg flavor injector
Mother’s baby bottom talcum applicator
Barber shop shaving cream lather maker
Veterinarian’s mechanical sperm injector
Bowler’s rosin dispenser
Musty room fragrance mister
Early drugstore needle vendor.

We’re saving the real answer for next month’s column. Have fun!*

*Devious deception perpetrated by Judd Caplovich, Vernon, CT.

Answer to September 2001 Issue Guess What..?

Continuing with the saga of “The Tale of Two Handles,” the fact that it’s French has some bearing – since it relates to wine – even though not exclusive to that nationality. As a heavy duty small droduction machine it is an ingenious wine bottle corker. Having three hands made the task a trifle simpler, much like patting your head, rubbing your stomach and scratching your nose.

After filling the top hopper with corks, one used the short handle to agitate, mix and jostle the contents, inducing it to drop down the vertical shaft. With the flared funnel-like bottom resting on the neck of the bottle, the long handle exerted extreme plunging pressure on the spongy cork – inserting it and creating a tight seal.*

*From the alcoholic collection of Mike Goodman.